Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Adiós 2008!

Goodbye 2008! I just feel like putting in some words here before the new year arrives. Got up early today as i was afraid to fall asleep again after the nightmare:(
I'm in Penang for a week already:) Yep, all the way here to spend some quality time with my special someone during this holiday. Having a good two weeks' break from work:) So 2008...had been quite a challenging year for me. One major thing that happened in this year was change. Change of environment, daily routine, goals as well as interest. Moving from a university's life to a working adult's was definately a big change for me. Like people said, out of your comfort zone. Precisely how I felt! I had been in schooling life for mm..let's calculate. 3-4 years in kindergarten(i did 1 year extra because i entered early together with my cousin bro who's a year elder) + 6 years in primary school + 5 years in secondary school + 1.5 years in Form 6 + 3 years in uni = 18.5-20 years! :O Everything was well taken care of by my ever so dedicated parents. To them, kids' educations are the most important thing and they always will ensure we get those no matter how tough they'd have to work. They have to bear the cost for four little monsters! But I'm so glad now that only two left. Myself has finished and Sis is finishing soon, in 2010 but they don't need to worry so much for her as she's taking study loan so it's fine. Back in those times I didn't need to worry much about so many things. I've got everything. School uniforms, stationaries, tuitions, school bus arranged and pocket money. All i had to worry was getting EXCELLENT grades in exams, not just good. They have never pressured me though. It was more like a silent pressure. I knew those were what they wanted and I did do well in almost all my major exams and they were very happy indeed. Only I was a little disappointed in my uni's grade. They aren't bad but just not good enough or so I thought. Anyway they aren't important anymore now. So yeah, that's the end of my student's life and moving towards a more realistic world. Here's the beginning of the life challenges. Everything was unpredictable and not pre-arranged like used to. Parents won't find for me my interest job, won't pay me allowance anymore(though i know they would give if I really ask with a thick face), won't buy me `uniforms' and won't arrange transportations. I have to do these all by own but of course they are always there whenever I need something. I know this is the time when I really have to be independant. Yeah,like they said-Grow up! I feel happy that I'm able to contribute at least some money to them and also buying things/food for my siblings.

The biggest challenge for me this year was to find my interest job. What i'm doing now has nothing to do with my degree - everyones says it's common such. A lot of thinkings was done and it took quite a while to figure somethings. No, I haven't figure out what I really want to do, yet. Yes, until now, honestly. I only have found out what I don't. I didn't want to be in the Biochem lab. Neither the clinical nor the research lab. So at least one thing was clear. Elimination is also one good way to find answers. Despite that, i certainly think that the knowledge will not go to waste. It is good to know for our body, our health and living a healthy lifestyle so i'm not upset about that. What's upsetting me,sometimes, is not able to know my true interest. Sooner or later,I'll probably will but I feel lost at times. Looking at peers who already pursuing their interest job makes me jealous sometimes. I feel like I'm way behind. Nevertheless, I am glad to be in this place I am now. I'd say this is a right place for me to learn and gain as much possible at my position now, granted with a bunch of truly amazing people who are so supportive and 'true'. I am thankful being here:) although I can't say what I'm doing now is what I really want. I've chosen not to think so much for now for at least I really am enjoying this. Meanwhile I'll make the best out of this opportunity and I'm pretty sure the day that I'll finally solve the big question will come. I have learnt to be more positive than i was before and it really helps to build the self-esteem that I need. But to come to this decision of being here has put me through quite some challenges - finding interest, job hunting stress, interview stages, huge debate sessions with parents which are really really upsetting, travelling to interview sites, money issues (stopped getting allowance after uni) and bla bla bla. At times like this, I was grateful to have these few awesome people to support me endlessly. I knew I could always count on them and I truly appreciate all of them. My parents, my siblings and my sweetheart. Sometimes I may not show the feelings on my face but deep down my heart stays my love for them. Here I meant my parents. Somehow our relationships are a little formal and non-expressive and this was the way we are brought up so we understood without saying.

Another thing to add on to my 2008 happenings' list is my graduation! Yes, after 18.5-20 years of school I have finally graduated! How excited! As excited as I could be, there also lie the fear to face the real world. Some said it is ruthless; it is the survival for the fittest, a metaphor to describe that only the fittest person will prevail in the competitive society. Similar to the Darwinism theory of natural selection (goodness of Bio knowledge-helps to enhance your blog;p). 070808 was my historical day in life. I was glad to have people whom I loved witnessed the joyful moment and especially my parents who i think might have heaved a sigh of relief while watching me walking off the stage with the scroll(fake scroll) and also might be thinking in their heads, 'Oh finally. One down'. haha! I really appreciate those who came and they have all made my day:) Not forgetting my awesome 080808 birthday celebration. Such an auspicious year for me. Oh well,that was not all! Of course I wouldn't miss out this one! Yet another amazing thing happened this year which has made my 2008 such a grrrreaaat one. The person I was casually hooked up with has now become that someone special:) and it's been really wonderful. He puts smiles on my face everyday. Almost everyday! Even when we are apart from each other (geographical barrier), he still does! I can't describe how much I appreciate his presence and the things he has done. He is simply amazing. I really feel like I'm the luckiest girl present. Thank you love:)

Overall, 2008 has been a WONDERFUL year. Now, I wish for another fantastic year ahead although i can't yet to foresee what's coming and what's not. If i'm asked for my New Year resolutions? Hrmmm...ok..if i have to have one or some...i'll say learn to be frugal - spend what is neccesary (quite a challenge), maximise the learning opportunities that I can get in my work, and keep as fit as possible. Perhaps I should start attending belly dancing classes again.

Oo can't wait for the ice-cream later, yum yum BR:D I'm running down for brunch first.
Cheers! Happy Happy New Year!
And Again, good bye sweet 2008! :D

2 comments:

Ruben Nair said...

Happy chinese new year !!!!

ahhahaha
casually hook up ahh... i was in tht room!!!

miss u guys!!

Gen~Gen said...

eh! no u weren't!!! u were at the pool with someone :P...heheheheh