Friday, April 1, 2011

It's been a journey...'s been a long time I had something posted here. And it's been a journey, I must say. Been through some elements of life that one would typically face as part of the cycle. Went through quite a fair bit of ...what you call it? Change? Experience? The most significant encounter since the last entry was..actually the loss of people who were dear to me. 2 in less a week's time. Nothing could be as awful as that and that was a thoroughly painful process. I don't want to talk further about it, I just want to move on. It was a traumatic period and I was really depressed by that. Anyway, I had to take it that it was all part of the plan, the plan of a magnificent power who controls the earth. I couldn't say anything more even though I strongly disagree.

The next intense experience I am going through is my work. I have been in this consulting biz for about 2.5 years since I graduated. Learning curve was steep. I was put to manage very intense workload and responsibilities. They have almost tripled since Sept '10. I learnt things I never thought I would at this level. I am doing things that most people of my level wouldn't have started doing. I was literally pushed to adapt to these new situations, new things. I must say my learning agility has started to develop a little and my ability to multi task should have improved by now. I felt like I was doing a million things at one time. Oh well, that could never be compared to my boss's plate, if mine was a million, hers would be a billion. I always think I am an octopus. Learning to manage superior was one of the new exp. Am still trying to find my ways around it. Not something you can learn overnight, it's an art. I want to be able to develop this.

Haah..if you ask me if I enjoy my work. Yes, I'd say I do. I like the industry, I like it being specialised. I like how professional the profession is. Certain things I love doing more than others. Because of the intense experience, I could see my strengths and my gaps quite well now. So, that is a good thing.

I work really hard now. There is not a single day now that I can sit around and do things at my preferred pace. I cannot go to gym in the evening during weekdays anymore. I even have to work late nights most of the time. I must say I can do this no problem because of my task orientation. But lately, it had started to prompt me to ponder. Why do I work so hard? yes, part of me striving to deliver what I have committed to, but really, what am making myself to work so hard? I could probably take a more laid back job but I want that neither. Do I want to do this for long run? I'd say no. I'd feel burnout. So, probably this is something that I need to bring to discuss. It's tough because you know they need that support and have kinda expected of you especially if there is so much trust given.

Well, as I started to ask these questions within myself, came a change outta sudden that have kinda put these to rest for now. Our company has been acquired by a larger consulting co who provides more HR services to clients. I suppose the change came about the right time. I am quite excited with this new change. Hopefully there are more opportunities for growth and to learn different things. Let's see how things progress :) Our new career journey started just today. No April's fool.

I must say I am very grateful having the boss I have who is also a mentor and friend to me. she is like a big sister to me who cares and really help me through my career journey. I have never imagined one could have so much trust and faith in me besides of course your family. She has SO much of that in me that I really feel honored. I guess she is the main factor that has kept me here in this job.

Ahh, I need to get some work done before sleep. feeling tired already. And I wish to head to bed earlier tonight after many nights of OT.

Chao chao!

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